What Does It Mean to be a Sex-Positive Counselor?
Being sex-positive within counseling and psychotherapy means that a counselor holds an affirmative view of human sexuality, seeing it as a natural and healthy part of human existence that varies among individuals (Williams, Thomas, Prior, & Walters, 2015). This means understanding and valuing the broad spectrum of human sexual experiences, from asexuality to polyamory, without judgment or bias (Nichols, 2006). A sex-positive counselor, thus, stands in contrast to traditional models which have, at times, pathologized or stigmatized certain sexual behaviors or identities. Furthermore, sex-positivity in counseling emphasizes comprehensive education and empowerment for clients, promoting informed choices about their bodies and relationships (Buehler, 2016). It also encompasses a respect for all consensual choices and identities, and a commitment to challenge the cultural, religious, or societal norms that stigmatize or limit sexual expression (Mosher, 2001).
In a therapeutic setting, a sex-positive counselor creates a space where clients feel safe discussing their sexual concerns without fear of judgment or shame. This means being well-versed in diverse sexual practices, orientations, and identities. Such knowledge not only helps in building rapport but also in offering informed guidance when clients need it (Nichols, 2006). Being sex-positive also involves understanding the intersectionality of sexuality with other aspects of identity like race, religion, disability, and socio-economic status and how these intersections can change one’s sexual experience (Zamboni & Crawford, 2007).
However, being sex-positive does not mean advocating for all types of sexual behaviors. A key tenet of sex-positivity is the emphasis on informed and consensual decisions (Williams et al., 2015). This means that any behavior that violates consent, involves exploitation, or causes harm, would not be condoned. In addition to embracing a non-judgmental approach, being a sex-positive counselor means advocating for social change. This might involve challenging discriminatory policies, advocating for comprehensive sex education, or contributing to a broader societal understanding and acceptance of diverse sexualities (Buehler, 2016).
In conclusion, being a sex-positive counselor is about much more than merely accepting all forms of sexual expression. It is about promoting understanding, challenging stigmas, advocating for informed choices, and pushing for societal change. The intimate setting of therapy allows clients to discuss their deepest concerns without fear, promoting healing and growth.
References
Buehler, S. (2016). What every mental health professional needs to know about sex. Springer Publishing Company.
Mosher, D. L. (2001). Sex-positive feminism: Whence and whither? The Journal of Sex Research, 38(1), 1–6.
Nichols, M. (2006). Psychotherapeutic issues with “kinky” clients: Clinical problems, yours and theirs. Journal of Homosexuality, 50(2–3), 281–300.
Williams, D. J., Thomas, J. N., Prior, E. E., & Walters, W. (2015). Introducing a multidisciplinary framework of positive sexuality. Journal of Positive Sexuality, 1, 6–11.
Zamboni, B. D., & Crawford, I. (2007). Minority stress and sexual problems among African-American gay and bisexual men. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 36(4), 569–578.
